Hearing test - Passed!

At Lila's 1 week appointment with the midwives, they did a hearing screen to make sure she could hear. Her right ear passed, but her left ear got a referral. The midwife assured as that this did not necessarily mean anything was wrong, but that her test wasn't sophisticated enough to determine the results. She told us that over 90% of referrals end up with perfectly good result. So she gave us the number to audiology department at The Children's Hospital and recommended we get the test.

We did the test on Wednesday. I found it pretty interesting. I don't know all the details, but I'll explain to you what my understanding is of the test. As you can see in the picture, three electrode things were put on Lila's head - one on her forehead and two behind each ear. Then a probe thing was placed in the ear to be tested. This probe is how the audiologist sent different frequencies of sound into Lila's ear. Now, for this test to work, Lila had to be completely asleep because in order to know if she could hear the sound, the audiologist checked if her brain was responding to it. Anytime a baby is awake, there is already brain activity - this interferes with the test.

It took a good hour to get Lila to fall asleep (yay for having a baby that nurses forever). But once she was asleep, there was no waking her up! We are blessed with a very heavy sleeper (like her mom). Many babies wake up multiple times during the test... not my kid! I actually couldn't help but laugh when the audiologist insisted on whispering. I knew my baby wasn't going to wake up!

Both of Lila's ears passed with flying colors! Since she slept so well, the test went fairly quick - probably around 20 minutes per ear. After this test, the audiologist performed an inner ear test. I honestly have no idea what this test was, but it didn't require the electrode things and it was super fast. She passed! The last test was to see if there was fluid in her ears. Nope, no fluid! The audiologist said Lila's ears were perfect :)

Back up to birth weight!

Yay!! Lila is now 8 pounds 10 ounces, which is a half ounce more than her birth weight :) We reached our goal and now we can stop supplementing the disgusting formula that she hated anyway. Seriously, she hated it. She'd spit it out and throw it up.

Oh happy day.

I need a nap.

Breastfeeding Challenges

One of my biggest fears regarding having a baby was the inability to breastfeed. Thank God that is not the case, but it has definitely been a challenge to successfully breastfeed.

Lila and I didn't not have the easiest of deliveries and as a result, she was not able to immediately try to breastfeed after birth. In addition, the difficult birth resulted with Lila having a pinched nerve in her left cheek which caused it to sag. My lactation consultant and pediatrician both agree that this made it more difficult for Lila to suck.

After I got stitched up at the midwifery, I attempted to breastfeed Lila with no luck. She showed some interest, but never actually had a successful latch. We left that night with a bottle of donated breast milk and a couple syringes. The midwife taught us how to feed Lila with a syringe while she sucked on our finger. This broke my heart, but I was optimistic that it would only take a few more tries before she was nursing like a pro.

This was not the case.

After two days, Lila was done with the bottle of breast milk and still hadn't successfully nursed from me. I was pumping what little I could and feeding her that along with the breast milk. I was really starting to get depressed about it and getting really discouraged. Our midwife gave us another bottle of donated milk and told me to meet with a lactation consultant asap. At this point, Lila had already lost 9.5 ounces and was down to 8 pounds.

I was finally able to get a hold of my consultant, Susan Sullivan, that evening and after learning about the situation and her pinched nerve, she suggested that I try a nipple shield. My parents were able to get one for me that night and to my pleasant surprise, Lila latched on perfectly to the nipple shield! This brought me tears of joy I was so happy. Of course, I would want to eventually ditch the shield, but this was the first positive sign of progress.

We stopped using the donated milk and I fed Lila with the shield on for close to 2 days. I didn't even attempt removing the shield at first because I wanted her to get used to sucking at my breast before changing things on her again. The first time I removed the shield, Lila latched on without a problem. Oh happy day!

At this point, Lila was close to 4 days old. We had paperwork from our pediatrician that said after 5 days, we could stop forcing Lila to eat after every 2-3 hours and let her tell us when she was hungry as long as she didn't go longer than 5 hours without eating. Since we had such a rocky start, we shouldn't have followed this, but we didn't know. As a result, Lila went 10 days without gaining any weight :( Now we are supplementing formula with most feedings until she is back to birth weight. Her next weight check is on Monday, and the pediatrician is confident that she'll be at a good weight by then.

When the midwife first told us that we were going to need to supplement with some formula, my heart sank. I didn't ever want to see that disgusting stuff enter her mouth. I even called the pediatricians that same day hoping that they wouldn't agree with the midwife, but they did. It was such a hard day for me and I'd cry every time she had to drink it. I felt like I failed her. I'm still sad about it, but doing much better. I'm certain that when we go in for a weight check on Monday that everything will be great and that the pediatrician will tell us to stop the supplementing.

On top of letting her sleep too long between feedings, I have also learned that I wasn't properly interpreting many of Lila's cries. I assumed that since I had just finished feeding her, she wasn't hungry. But I've since learned that she'll often act as though she's done, but not really be. Now that I'm feeding her more often and learning when she's hungry, I believe that I could get her weight up without the formula, but we're feeding it to her anyway because it's what the pediatrician recommends. We usually only feed it to her for the day feedings though because all three of us are too exhausted for the middle of the night feedings. I absolutely hate waking her up so often. Many times I have to put a cold towel on her to wake her up and it makes me sad to do it to her. By the time I wake her up, feed her, and Dave gives her formula, it's usually been well over an hour which means the process starts all over again in about another hour. It's brutal on all of us. And since we believe Lila's sleep is also important, we have decided to skip the formula in the middle of the night. She still gained 5 ounces in 2 days doing this, so I'm not worried about her not getting enough.

So yeah, breastfeeding has not been easy, but I believe we'll be pros at it in no time. I'll keep you posted regarding her weight on Monday!

2 Week Check-up

My Lila PIe is already 2 weeks old! I can't believe how quickly that went by.

We had her two week check-up today. Everything is looking good. We've had some issues with weight gain, but she gained 5 ounces in only 2 days so that's great. That puts her at 8 pounds 5 ounces, so she still isn't back up to her birth weight, but she's well on her way. We have a weight check scheduled for Monday and hope that she'll be at least her birth weight of 8 pounds 9.5 ounces. We've been supplementing a little formula after each feeding for the past 2 days and the pediatrician asked us to continue to do so until Monday when we expect her weight to be where we want.

At Lila's one week check-up at the midwifery, they noticed a little signs of jaundice. Nothing to be concerned about, but suggested we give her a little sun each day. The only evidence of the jaundice was in her eyes - they were yellow-ish in color. Now there is only a tiny bit of yellow in the corner of her eyes and the doc said her color looks great. Yay!

Although weight gain has been a concern, growth has not. She has grown 1.25 inches since birth and is in the 80th percentile for height. Even her weight is in the 50th percentile. Her head circumference increased by 0.25 inches and is in the 70th percentile. Here are her specific stats:

Weight: 8 pounds 5 ounces
Height: 21.25 inches
Head Circumference: 14.25 inches

Our next appointment (not counting the weight check) is when she's two months old. That's when we'll start vaccinations.

Lila's Birth Story

My beautiful baby girl was born on August 26, 2010. Her name is Lila Danielle Lofte. I want to share with you the story of her birth.

Warning: very very long.

At about 4:00 am, I woke up because I had to pee. When I got out of bed, I felt some liquid come out. It wasn't huge gush, so I wasn't sure if my water broke or not, but it seemed like it. I took a few steps and some more came out. I checked to make sure it was clear and didn't have a foul odor and continued my way to the bathroom. I still wasn't sure if my water did indeed break, so I went pee and went back to bed. I knew that if my water did break, it wouldn't be long before contractions started. Sure enough, I started having mild contractions within 20 minutes. I woke up Dave to let him know and called the midwifery to let them know as well.

Just as we were told in classes, the midwife told us to try to get rest in between contractions because I was going to need the energy later. This wasn't a problem for Dave :) However, my contractions were already only about 3 minutes apart, so it was rather difficult to get any sleep. But although they were only 3 minutes apart, they weren't real strong and they were only lasting about 30-40 seconds. The "general rule" for first time moms is that they head into the birth center when contractions are 3 minutes apart, 1 minute in length, and have followed that general pattern for 1 hour (3-1-1).

I called the midwife a couple times over the next few hours letting her know the status of my contractions. She assured me that if I was able to make the phone call, I didn't need to come in yet. Dave would be the one making the phone call because I wouldn't be able to. So I continued to keep track of my contractions with BabyBump on my iPhone. I tried to eat some food, but it was making me feel nauseous, so I just made sure to drink a lot of water.

My contractions never did fall into the 3-1-1 pattern. But they got a lot stronger and had a consistent pattern of 4-5 minutes apart and 90 seconds in length. This is when Dave called. Our midwife, Leigh, told Dave that if I felt like I should head in, then we could. Contractions were getting pretty darn powerful and I could feel that Lila was pretty far down in my pelvis, so at sometime between 12p and 1p, we (my parents included) went to the birth center.

This is when I really lost all sense of time.

After spending a few minutes walking around and breathing through contractions, Leigh suggested that I get into the birthing tub. Oh my goodness, it was so warm and wonderful in there. Contractions were a lot more bearable in there. I wasn't in there long before Leigh decided to check how dilated I was... 9 centimeters! Wow, I was basically ready to start pushing. I could have my baby in no time... theoretically.

When the contractions got really bad, Dave hopped in the tub with me so that he could easily put counter pressure on my lower back. It's amazing how big of a difference that made. Before I knew it, it was time to start pushing. But unfortunately, I wasn't making any progress. I guess this can be especially common with first time moms in the tub because the comfort of the warm water slows things down. So when it was clear that I wasn't getting anywhere, Leigh had me move to a birthing stool with Dave sitting behind me.

Moments after sitting on it, meconium comes pouring out. Not. Good. If you don't know, meconium is the first thing babies poop. Sometimes it's only the first poop, sometimes it's the first several poops. Regardless, this meant that Lila had pooped. So now she's swimming around in meconium. Leigh said this wasn't good and needed to double check how long I had to push out my baby before needing to be transferred to the hospital. Great... I haven't even been at the birthing center for that long and there's already talk of the hospital. This made me a little nervous, but I couldn't think about it too much over the pain of the contractions.

Leigh returned a few minutes later saying that it wasn't an emergency and I had plenty of time to get my baby out. The nurse just needed to keep a close eye on Lila's heart rate to make sure she wasn't stressed. Time to start pushing again.

Pushing on the stool wasn't nearly as comfortable as the tub, but I eventually started to make some progress. However, once I was making progress, Lila's heartbeat started to drop. This concerned the midwife and nurse, so they didn't want me on the stool any more. Next up was the bed.

The first position Leigh had me try was for me to be sitting at an incline on the bed. Leigh had me hold onto one of her hands. With each push, I had to try to pull Leigh towards me. This was working great for Lila - her heart rate was great - but I was getting no where. Leigh check how Lila was positioned and how low her head was and determined that she was actually at a weird angle. I don't know exactly how she was positioned, just that her head wasn't coming through in the ideal way. This explained why it was so hard for me.

In hopes of getting Lila to move, Leigh had me get on my hands and knees (still in the bed). Every time I pushed, I was to bring my butt down to the bed. By now, I was extremely tired and it was almost immediately clear that this wasn't going to lead to anything successful. Leigh decided that I needed some rest.

All this time, the nurse and Dave were forcing me to drink some liquid to keep me hydrated. I was offered food, but the thought made me want to throw up. I didn't even want to drink, but like I said, I was forced - and for good reason. So during my resting period of about 15 or 20 minutes, I had to just breathe or lightly push through contractions and Dave was given the lovely task of making sure that two glasses of that stuff went down my stubborn throat. I think this was the only time I got even just a little bit mad at him. There's nothing more irritating than having a straw shoved at your face while trying to survive another contraction.

Once resting time was over, I did some more pushing on the bed while pulling on Leigh's hand. It was at this point that Leigh said I had been pushing for over 4 hours and that if I didn't get my baby out soon, I would have to be transferred. Actually, she specifically said, "if you don't get this baby out in a few more pushes, you'll have to go to Swedish where they'll stick a vacuum in your vagina and pull your baby out".

First of all... 4 hours?!?! I swear it only felt like maybe an hour to me. I couldn't believe it had been that long. And now more hospital talk? And vacuum? No. Thanks.

Leigh and the nurse decided that since I had the best success on the stool, that I should go back there and they'd just keep a close eye on Lila's heartbeat. They also told me that my baby didn't really like it on the stool and that I needed to push her out quickly.

By now, I was so exhausted and all this hospital talk was discouraging me. I was losing confidence in myself and starting to believe that I wasn't going to be able to do it. But I wanted so bad to be able to deliver my baby at the birth center and was terrified of the idea of going to the hospital. I had such a mixture of emotions.

Once I stepped off the bed, the pressure to get Lila out was substantially greater. I remember Leigh asking me to go somewhere or do something and I was like "no, I have to push" and went to the stool and started pushing. After a few pushes, Leigh said she could see Lila's head and that she had a lot of hair. WTF? My baby has hair?! I was totally expecting a bald baby. It wasn't too many pushes before Leigh put my baby in my arms and I heard her first cries. This was at 6:42 pm.

Almost immediately after it was certain that Lila was all good and well, Leigh said that I was bleeding a lot and needed to get to the bed asap. This kinda freaked out Dave (he saw how much blood there was) and the nurse saw it on his face and reassured him that it was ok. Once I was on the bed with my baby, Leigh told me that I had a lot of tearing and was going to need a major stitch job. I was bummed to hear this, but didn't really care because I was too busy looking at my beautiful... wait, do we have a girl or a boy?! Girl! I wasn't surprised, haha. Dave and I just laid there staring at her for several minutes.

When Leigh asked me to push the placenta out. I gave a little push and didn't really feel anything, but she said it came out. Awesome - that was easy. Unfortunately, I had to stay laying on my back until my stitches were done which meant Lila didn't get to immediately try to breastfeed. At least I got to stare at her beautiful face. Once I was given all my numbing shots, Dave cut the cord. Speaking of the cord, Leigh and the nurse were very impressed with Lila's cord - they said it was very hearty. Then Dave followed the nurse so she could show him the placenta and tell him things about it - gross.

To bring the story to end, Lila had all her newborn things done (vitamin K shot, eye cream stuff, measurements, lung and heart checks) and I got my second degree tears stitched up. I also took about a 10 minute bath in some special herb to help with the stitches. Dave took Lila out to the waiting room so that she could meet her grandparents. I wanted to be there when they met her, but I knew they were probably going crazy knowing that she was born and not seeing her. I think it was a good hour after she was born that I told Dave to take her out to them. It was several hours before I was stitched up and ready to have them come in to see me.

About 6 hours after Lila was born, we all piled into my little Honda Civic and took my beautiful daughter home.